Online dating is a proven formula that works, if one follows the rules. A key to understanding online dating is that these are not intended for ordinary affairs, but deep connections with the potential for long-term or permanent loving partnerships. Here is a list of the top ten mistakes online daters make. Avoid these, and you can hope to increase the likelihood of meeting his or her true partner sooner.
1. Talking about your ex
This is true whether dating online or in person. Talking about one’s ex is a well-known dating taboo. Eliminate messages of missing your ex or getting over your ex. Do not mention him or her at all.
2. Lying about your age
Be honest about your age even if what you are looking for is an older or younger partner. Lying to attract someone else in the age range you are seeking, will never be acceptable.
3. Lying about relationship status
Be clear from the start. It is unfair to your future mate to pretend. The potential damage to one’s home-life with these lies should not need mentioned, and yet there are some who still believe they won’t get caught.
4. Focusing on the negative
One should be fair and open, but there is more to anyone than just the negative. You needn’t brag, but when approaching a potential mate, advertise what there is to offer rather than what to avoid. Perhaps you a are an excellent provider with comedic timing or a talented cook with a loyal and creative spirit.
5. Rushing to meet and obtain personal contact information
One spectacular feature of online dating sites is the ability to get to know each other well in a safe environment. There is opportunity to truly get to know one another without the pressure of a curfew or awkward dinner conversation. Take your time before asking for or sharing personal information.
6. Being unclear about your expectations
If you’re worried about whether you are ready to get involved, online dating might not be the place for you. If you’ve no wish to wed ever, say so. If you are only interested in those looking for a serious and committed relationship, say so. The right partner will have the same desires.
7. Lying about having children
It is tempting to think children can be mentioned later, but this couldn’t be further from the truth. Children should be mentioned up front as in some cases, this could be a deal breaker.
8. Falling for a “Cam Scam”
These sites are not established for one to find flirty camera girls who speak with lonely men by the hour. For dating purposes, it is both inappropriate and illegal to solicit contact and payment in such a fashion. Avoid it at all costs.
9. Save the sexy talk
While innuendo can be humorous and flirty, it can also send mixed signals to a promising loved one. If you are here to find a relationship, don’t waste your time or theirs.
10. Being generic or dull
One of the advantages to online dating is that you can craft your messages and responses to reflect the real you. Short winks or hello’s without substance place you firmly in the pile of rejections. Take your time and show your best side at every opportunity.
Lynn works as a dating adviser for Lovestruck Hong Kong. She has been advising expats on the cultural differences when dating in Hong Kong for over 5 years and as learn a lot about relationships on the way.